I Know the Meaning of Words

What do words mean ?
How can I not understand their meaning ?
I see a rock, I call it a “rock”, πετρα, it is a rock.
I see a bird. I say: This is a “bird”, πουλη. It is a bird.
I understand the meaning of these.

I say “I love you”.
I understand the meaning of those words. They mean:
I
Love
You.

You say: “I am yours, all of me. Forever”.
I think – I thought – I understand the meaning of THOSE words.
But they seem to to have taken on a different meaning.
What was said is no longer true.
I simply do not understand
the meaning of words.

But…….
I know words.
They are my armor, my shield
One day, I know, they will become lost to me, useless
Like rusted mail.
But for now, they are my strength.
So why do I no longer understand ?

What viral process has affected my heart so
now that our paths diverge,
now that you seek to determine if this other is what you want ?
It weakens me. It scars me. It makes me, illiterate.

And to whom will I speak of this ?
No-one.
Never.
Not even you, whom I thought was – think is ? – my half.
What can I say ? How can I say it ?

How will you ever step from this box in which you find yourself ?
It denies you.
Your brilliance.
Your beauty.
Your ability to contribute.
How ? If I, your guide, have become fluently aphasic, illiterate.
How ?
Time is so short. Do you not see ?

I know the meaning of words.
Why then, am I lost amongst so many of them ?
Why this dull, grey mist enveloping me where once, brilliant, you stood ?
My Batini, tell me.

——————————————
2017
Far from you.

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About teserak1

I am Noman
Gallery | This entry was posted in Now, Poetry and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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